Saturday 12 January 2019

When life gives you lemons...

So we’re into the new year now and I’ve started thinking about what may lay ahead and have definitely drawn that line under all that went before last year, to bring me to this place. Many of my recent blogs have explored my feelings about all of that: the job resignation, the need for a complete career break, the necessity of having some head space - I don’t need to evidence it all again here. Needless to say, analysing it all, it would be easy to surmise that life gave me some lemons last year. So what should I do with them?

Lots of quirky phrases are out there to complete the statement ‘when life gives you lemons...’ They are found on t-shirts, memes and more, so go ahead and pick one that suits you best. What statement would I choose? 
Well, I could follow the usual saying and make lemonade. In my experience though, anything fizzy is all very exciting at the beginning but usually gets messy very quickly and I don’t need anything else sticky to clear up in my life! 

Talking of clearing up, there are many good uses for a lemon in regard to their cleaning properties - now I’m thinking of all those household tips where a lemon is your best friend but I don’t think the marigolds look is quite the fashion statement that I’m going for. Even though metaphorically speaking, I am certainly cleaning house - new broom and all that.

I am finding my direction at the moment and also thinking about how to organise myself a new routine, for I do think that life without any routine does quickly lose its appeal and anyway, there are always things that have to be done at some point in the day or week. Necessity is the mother of invention, or so the saying goes. Well the necessity of the dog needing exercise has meant that I am carving out certain times of the day devoted to exercise both for the dog and myself. Secondly, cutting out one wage earner from the family will obviously have implications which we are yet to adjust to. As part of this though, I have found myself re-evaluating how we shop and how and what we cook, which in the long term will bring more home cooking - in turn hopefully developing my confidence in creating meals. Lastly, I have also been considering when I schedule in writing opportunities for myself- so far this year, I have managed to write in some way or another on almost every day, though I now need to find the time and inspiration to begin a real project properly.

This Christmas I received two kitchen gadgets that I am yet to try out: a new mixer and a slow cooker. I feel like a trailer for one of those glossy TV cookery programmes extolling the virtues of home baking and meals designed to complete the image of the happy family seated around the table, sharing anecdotes about their day. Yet, it is something that I aspire to. I have always enjoyed baking and creating cakes for various occasions so I am looking forward to re-visiting this and maybe having the space and time to improve some of the recipes and skills that go along with that. As for the family meals, I have always liked it when we have been able to sit together around a table to eat. I think that is often a fading image in the busy lives that many of us lead these days but I have always found it to be important to pause, share food and time with each other. As the children have got older, our lives have become more disjointed and we’re often eating at different times from each other. We’re certainly rarely eating the same meal, even if sat together for it. Having a new-found vegan regime to cater for as well as other dietary preferences within the family certainly adds to the complexity of dinner time. Saturday evenings are often the best time of the week, as it is then that everyone’s timetables align and all 4 of us sit together for a short while, well some weeks anyway.

Isn’t it funny when you look back at how mealtimes went when the children were young? All those tricks and games you tried to get the kids to try vegetables and stop playing long enough to have some food. Now, as young adults, they would eat the entire contents of the fridge without blinking and one of them wants nothing but vegetables! As for the ‘choo choo train’ or ‘aeroplane coming’ on a fork, no such coaxing is required but has actually been replaced by delivery drivers bringing Just Eat or Uber Eats deliveries that the kids have ordered on their phones without our knowledge! A sign of the times that food, like many other aspects of life now, can be delivered at a click or a swipe and bring almost instant gratification. The tap screen immediacy of modern life leaves little space for real, hands on experiences and is a dangerous path for us all to follow without stopping to stand still, look at our surroundings and get messy once in a while. Roll some dough in your hands, smell the herbs you are crushing and wait for a while to taste the food you have created because just perhaps you might enjoy it more, if you’ve had to work for it?

For me, it is the process of the meal making or the baking that is part of the benefit, as well as saving money or making healthier choices than following a take-away route. I like to lose myself in my thoughts in the kitchen whilst creating meals or bakes and there is also something about providing nourishment for others. Is that a wired-in notion of being a mother? Is it caught up in being a feeder, a provider, part of liking to please others? Perhaps a psychologist would have something to say on that issue? 

So what else is left for my lemon choices? They’re well known health benefits for colds, sore throats and restoring my son’s vocal chords prior to a gig mean that they’re often coupled with honey in our kitchen. I’ve heard the expression ‘just suck it and see’ but I would be cautious about sucking on a lemon - in fact I’ve always been mindful of advice about what you should put in your mouth!

So, all things considered, I’m not going to juggle lemons or slice them for a G & T. For now, I’m going to throw a casserole in my slow cooker and reinvent the cake that my friends and family enjoy - my famed lemon cake. The bigger picture can wait whilst I go ahead with this part, one answer that I can go with... When life gives you lemons, bake cake.


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